talking is the hardest thing to do

Actually no. Talking in itself is easy. It's an intuitive act of opening one's mouth and emitting syllables. Words. That sometimes may not even need to make sense. But speaking, communicating, essentially is an arduous task. It's a dangerous job. A big responsibility if you'd like. For communicating requires a message to be sent and received. And between that millisecond when a message is being said to the time that it reaches someone's ear and is being processed by the brain, lots of trouble could already have been brewing. The tone of voice, the choice of words, the gestures and facial expressions that accompany the message....all play a big part in deciding if successful communication manages to take place. If it all doesn't go well, this act of speaking automatically becomes a major crime; a weapon that can damage deep down to the place where it hurts the most. Sometimes leaving scars. Really, it's like walking on broken glass.

So some people choose to talk less. Because it's all statistics really. The less you talk, the less you make mistakes, the less potential hurt you can cause and/or sustain. 

It's a terrible option. 

Without talking and communicating, we become further apart. And this distance, with time, will get further. And many a time, realisation comes too late. 

I would rather talk and make lots of mistakes. Be confrontational. Say it out and disagree. What's so scary about that. But of course, it's easy if it just depends on how I feel. Truth is, communication is a two-way street. And the other street is always harder to take on. It's unpredictable and out of our hands. 

What you gonna do? 

Al posto mio, che fai?

Ring a ding the engagement bell rings

Still can't believe he asked me today. In the most unexpected way at the most unexpected moment. No doubt since we have talked about it, all it took was the right moment. Still when it happened, I didn't know how it did. And with The Moment playing in the background, it was like when we first became better friends. And I forgot that it wasn't that long ago we decided to be together. Sometimes things just happen in the most unexpected way. 

I'm giving you this, in the promise of marriage next year. As you are a good girl and that I would like us to be together in marriage. I hope you will be happy to accept it. Will you marry me? 

Yes. 

How does it feel? Happy in a way I can't describe. 

Also strange. Nice but strange. 

He said he chose today because it's Chinese New Year's Eve, it's a Saturday, and he loves Saturdays. And my family's here..so it's a nice moment. 

Plus, in retrospect, today's also 9th Feb, and 9 九 signifies 久, which means long time, and thus 天长地久, forever. 

Technically yesterday since it's 10th Feb now. But since I've yet to go to bed, it's still today. OMG, I got engaged today. 

Passion and impulses

Passionate people can be expressive or subtle. The expressive ones tend to be more outward with their feelings and their various manifestations. Passion is certainly important in a person's life. I believe that no one can live a fulfilling life without passion. Sure it's easy to simply cruise along, going where life takes you. But without passion, the will to live a more fulfilling life, the search for happiness and the desire to become a better person in all possible personal definitions, become less relevant and subsequently, less important.

Yet for expressive passionate people, there's always a danger of succumbing to their impulses. And when this happens, how does one actually differentiate between real passion and real impulses. An impulse is necessary to drive the action expressing passion. But when one becomes blinded by the desire for action, impulses may override passion. And when the passion ceases, the action becomes irrelevant, or wrong.

They say that passion fades, but real love lasts forever. Yes but the concept of real love is a huge and deep one. Real love takes work. It's not a given and definitely not a certain 'next step' from passion. Real love is giving and taking, understanding and patience, getting angry and forgiving all in a matter of one breath, and much much more. When one's willing to do that, one can preach about having true love for someone else other than oneself.

In this day, we are quick to decide. We let our passion manifests itself via our impulses and our constant need for action. But can we stand by our decision? Only time can tell.

i try to sleep

people who know me know that i don't have problem sleeping. i can sleep anywhere. and i really mean ANYWHERE. on the bed, on the sofa, on the chair, on the plane, standing up...as long as i am tired enough, i will sleep. 

and i definitely don't have problems sleeping at night. i attribute my youthful looks (or so i am inclined to think i still do have) to this, and SKII. 

anyway, i should really try to sleep earlier, given my relatively morning-oriented schedule. but it seems that my body clock has gotten used to sleeping at or after 01:30 every morning/night. and it simply refuses to cooperate. or maybe it's the mind who's controlling it.

especially today, when i am a little overwhelmed with excitement. since i've been spending a little bit more time on planning and coordinating, it seems increasingly real. although in reality it is still pretty far away. 

we've had all these uncertainties and fleeting moments when we doubt, or fear. or both. but at the end of it all, the feelings are sure, and the wanting is certain. and we have to face it with open arms. after all, no one knows what truly will happen in future. just embrace it and go along. 

every day is an adventure. it may not seem to be. it may seem dry, routined, and predictable. but you'll never know. that's the beauty of it.

sogno d'oro. adesso. subito.

 

Modà feat. Jarabedepalo - Come un pittore - Videoclip Ufficiale

one of my favourite songs for sure.
truly a romantic. can't be changed. deep rooted.

Mina & A. Celentano _ Parole parole _ 1972

今天的心情

见或不见 --仓央嘉措
2010-09-29 23:02:08

你见，或者不见我
我就在那里
不悲不喜

你念，或者不念我
情就在那里
不来不去

你爱，或者不爱我
爱就在那里
不增不减

你跟，或者不跟我
我的手就在你手里
不舍不弃

来我的怀里
或者
让我住进你的心里
默然 相爱
寂静 欢喜

其实真正的爱情就应该是这样。不能衡量谁付出的比较多，谁爱谁多一点。只要已选择去爱，就得放胆去爱。直到最后。就算是遍体鳞伤，也绝不后悔。不离不弃。