the dating game

posted Saturday, Feb 11, 1:10pm

A good friend fell out of love today, or what she thought. Guy didn't call her after he promised her he would, and supposedly made some lame excuses after she found out that he was contactable after all. So she thought that he was avoiding her; that he was trying to get away from her. And she was bewildered, sad, crushed, broken-hearted. Kept asking, "was it me?" "what did I do?" "did I scare him?" And I said, maybe you are overanalysing it. Maybe he just forgot. Maybe he isn't as heartless as you think. Maybe this, maybe that. But she was sad anyway. There was nothing I could say or do to make her feel better, so I don't try. I just sat there with her, drinking with her and listening to all her complaints. Be her so-called shoulder to cry on, and a friend to lean on. Sigh, this dating game. It's way too complex for my taste. Maybe it's because I haven't been single for a long while; maybe it's just because I'm not one to play games. I'm straightforward, candid, and frank. I say it how I mean it, and do things the way I see fit. All this guessing, all this one-sided troubles, worries, and suspicion are definitely not for me. But I do understand how it may trouble my single friend, who has finally found a possible chance at love. Or at least a sustainable infatuation. So the night went on, with neither of us dancing to the house music Zouk was playing. We just sat outside the compound, her crying, and I smiling. Why? Because when one is sad and pessimistic, the other needs to be up and optimistic. Otherwise life would be miserable, and we'll never get out of the rut. To cut the long story short, he finally sms her again, saying that he missed her. She bought partially. Mainly because she wanted to. (This was after we deleted his contact number and all his messages from her phone). Then she told him she could meet him, beaming of course. And when he didn't immediately reply, she got all annoyed again and said that he was simply pulling her along. But of course, once again it didn't last long. Once he told her he would meet her, off she went. Sigh, this dating game. I don't think I'd enjoy it. But it still made me smile to see my friend hating and yet also loving it. After all, it's what makes our dull lives seem more bearable. If romances are always perfect, with no turmoil whatsoever, then life would be dull and dry. And people will never appreciate what they have. Only after we've experienced the annoyance of the dating game, the initial difficulties, the constant guessing, that we realise how fortunate we are to have found our soulmates. Well, sometimes I wish I had a chance at the typical dating game. But other times I'm glad I'm spared the trouble. After all, if it ain't broke, don't fix it. I have found love, so why seek one? Unless it comes and proves to be stronger and better than what I have of course...But that's the risk one has to take in love. That's what makes love beautiful and indispensable.