After my much-needed break in Vancouver, I return recharged and focused, equipped with a greater understanding of myself and new optimism towards my life and my possible future. The crippling sense of melancholy and self-pity I went there with almost all evaporated as I surrounded myself with my loved ones - the true friends who love me for who I really am. I felt that I was being myself. It felt like I was home. Yet as I left them for Singapore, there was no sense of loss or sadness. Instead, I felt as if the love that I've experienced has transferred itself on me, such that I was ready to give that love to other people who matter to me. I came home with so much love to give, and so much appreciation for my life and my fortunate circumstances. In retrospect, it seems so silly of me to have wallowed in self-pity, when I am actually really blessed with so many good things in life. All the emotional troubles that were plaguing me now seem so inconsequential. Not that they don't matter. Rather, I've learnt to not take them so seriously. For real happiness comes when you take the best things from your circumstances and focus on them. I have wonderful parents and siblings, a great home, a satisfying job and fulfilling lifestyle, close friends whom I love and love me dearly, and most of all I have a guy I care so much about. With all these and so much love, how can I not be satisfied? How can I not cherish what I have, and instead lament about life as if it has treated me badly? I can't.
I want to embrace life fully and happily like I should be. Now that's more me. :)
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